Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Hot in the city...tonight...!

ello all!
Well I'm in Bombay! You know how sometimes you'll see something and suddenly realise why they have a certain phrase or word for it? Well for Bombay the word's vibrant.
On my way in, even as the plane went dangerously close to the slums right before the airport, in my head, almost like some sort of premonition of things to come, I could hear this totally awesome background music building. Anyway, from the minute I saw it, I began to subconsciously compare it and only the other day when I was thinking about how Ill go about this post, it struck me just how much like Dubai this place is.
They've got malls, people dressed up, shopping, food, clean roads, beaches, sunsets, sky scrapers, buildings, cabs, Indians, different names for different areas which is accepted as common knowledge to all who've set foot here...they have it all and yet- there's something more.
There's something about the way thousands of people will walk around this city, doing their own thing, leading their own lives, secluded in a less physical way, yet they all seem to have this one common factor-that theyre in Bombay! For some reason, still quite inexplicable to me, everytime I look out of a cab, I can literally drown in the vibe this place gives off.
See the stores and the restaurants aren't dead consumeristic outlets, they're a place to be. The buildings aren't just boring function aimed structures, they've got culture, memories, reason, energy, and in some cases- gargoyles! YES! GARGOYLES!
It's not a row of shops in a symmetrical pattern, it's a bunch of guys running stores their own way with people they know and people who know them! Cabs aren't uniform vehicles, theyre each so incredibly unique, and outdated which just adds to it. Every cab will have a differnt interior or a different sticker on the back or front or sides-anywhere! Every building will have it's official name and the name people actually call it. Every store has a guy with a different way of looking at things. The beach isn't clean and healthy, its messy and beautiful! I ate dog meat thinking it was mutton! It's not a place you HAVE to be in for money or for work, it's a place you LOVE to be in. It's a culture, a vibe, a way of life, a stamp, light or dark but always permanent on who you are, it's validation almost, that you've been a part of the buzz and can be proud. It's beautiful!
To me, Bombay is sort of like Mother India's bachelor son, still in his twenties having a blast, loving and being loved, as opposed to say- Jaipur, which is the more regal diplomatic kid with degrees and responsibilities!
I've been here 10 days now, and that's nothing, but no city has ever hit me the way this one has. Maybe I want to love it, maybe I'm conditioning myself out of fear of hating it, maybe I'm expecting too much- or too little for that matter. Perhaps it's that there's history behind it, and there's a culture that people have adhered to for decades, as opposed to Dubai's still goo-goo-gah-gah-ing age. Perhaps it's that Bombay's chosen to be Bombay, and not part US, English, Dutch, African, Indian and Muslim! All I know is I'm in Bombay and I feel good!

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Tossing scrambled eggs

So, in Dubai, at my Aunt's place, they had the radio on pretty much all day. So basically everything you did had this soundtrack to it. But then one day just as Lou Reed had helped me through some work(Du du du du tu du), the soundtrack stopped. It wasn't an ad, or a DJ talking, no, it was...a psychiatrist! And an American one at that. I was ecstatic! An american shrink on the radio? This obviously meant he was an intellectual with a wacky family and a staring dog! And ofcourse, it did not. Turns out he was as dull as dull gets and his speech pattern resembled that of a microwave.
However it wasn't that most vacuum cleaners have better intonations than him that annoyed me, no it was how he approached what was nothing short of a brilliant idea. What's his job? Over the obvious song selection, sponsor worship and news reading(Angelina's got another one! Like oh my god!), he basically hears people with issues clearly more important than a sense of privacy, broadcast their problems with thousands listening, hoping he'll give them the solution, that one answer that'll cause a collective 'hmmm' from all his listeners as they realise how insignificant their problems really are.
Instead, in a thousand admittedly unique and special ways, he tells them to 'seek professional help', which is interesting you see, because he claimed to be providing just that. You have these people calling him, bearing their souls to him and allowing themselves to be completely vulnerable, with the slight expectation that maybe he may have some insight into their problems and how to deal with it. Instead, he turns out to be an advetisement, a BAD advertisement for all other pyschiatrists!
This radio ass aside, the approach of modern science to people and their problems really makes me sick. The one thing I fear most, is that eventually, logically enough, we'll spread out so much that the only way we can stay together is through a generalised web of politically correct rules and systems until even love can be 'procured', and a hug will be quantifiable. Ever since they decided to term depression as 'bi polar disorder', the way people deal with problems (treatment) has changed. If you're kid's depressed you give him a pill! If he lacks enthusiasm you give him a pill! It's so simple to be logical. So easy to blame a biological or chemical malfunction in someone's head for them having problems. Anorexia, manic depression, suicidal tendencies, don't start because of endorphins or some chemical in your head. They start because of very real, very difficult issues. Losing someone, being un-loved, being afraid, being human!
The doctor on the radio mentioned how alcoholism was dealt with by the immediate family providing love in an 'organised' fashion. Fuck him. There's no organised fashion of loving. You've got a problem you bear it. You don't need pills. If you have a problem, figure out why, be honest to yourself about something getting to you, and then find the best solution you can. Deal with your problems don't get diagnosed for them! I don't know. This is where I stand. It's hard when you've got shit to bear, so fix it. It's alot nicer not feeling like crap! Isn't THAT logical!?

Friday, May 04, 2007

Make me pure...not Ashley...

Alright. In a bid to start blogging EVERYday, I have decided I will blog TOday and hope the presumption of your collective anticipation will see me through another post tomorrow! Today's meaty steak to sink my teeth in would be something I've never tried before....FOOTBALL!

Ok, now that all hopes of the 'dream' Champions league final are out the windie and indeed the European (international hm?) football scene seems a little dandier for UEFA to propogate, I think it's time I did this post, which frankly I've been burning to do since the pulsating start to Gameweek 36 of the English premier league.
What basically happened was, at the end of 45 minutes of regulation football, it seemed certain that Chelsea would go on to beat Bolton(pronounced cunts on this blog) and Manchester United would go on to lose at Everton. What actually happened was Manchester United won in the ugliest of fashions and Chelsea drew in a slightly more exciting fashion- which wasn't very exciting at all actually- but then Bolton was playing and Chelsea was playing and somewhere in the middle of it all they expected a football match to take place.
Anywho, the point of this post, is to bring to light just how significant this season in the EPL has been, not just to this year, not just to this league, not even just to football, in fact to mankind in general!
Yes such is the depth and extent of the pure evil that Chelsea football club has turned into over the past 3 years, that even an Arsenal fan is willing to stand and say he proudly rooted for Manchester United! This year, English football encountered the ultimate battle - of beauty and flair VS. logic and money.
The first instance, where money won, was when a GBP200 million pounds worth Chelsea team were able to overcome an Arsenal side of an average age of 19.5, and go on and win the prestige and glory of the Carling cup. They played long balls, shot at all instances and decided passing would only be used as a time wasting technique. Arsenal played through balls and made moves that involved all players to use not just their instinct but yes, their skill too(Fuck you Julio). Arsenal dominated Chelsea won. Arsenal entertained Chelsea won.
The rest of the season has basically seen Manchester United's efforts serve as the saviour football has called for these past two years. When Manchester United were hated they were hated for being arrogant cocky bastards,( and also for David Beckham :)), but they had style. Chelsea however, are arrogant, cocky bastards who whine through the blatant luck which they ride on and play dull unattractive football in a club which has effectively exterminated any lingering passion or tradition. Man U were respected, Chelsea are not.
Football has since the start been a sport. A sport has since the start been a test. A test of man's ingenuity, innovation, skill, control over the rawest of all gifts-his body, and most importantly, his creative ability to make something beautiful of it all. Football, and I suppose most team sports stand out in this respect because it's the combiend beauty of a team. Arsenal and admittedly United too, have for several years now, graced the sport with such beauty. Flair, attacking football that makes you gasp and gape and cheer and smile and cry and get that makes you FEEL their passion!
Chelsea on the other hand, represent an assemblage of the two things that will eventually destroy mankind- Logic and money.
Roman Abrahamovich, a brilliant businessman, has put together with his hard earned money a team of professionals who provide a systematic tactical method that ensures a) Strategic efforts to frustrate and obstruct any creativity on the pitch b) a method for acheiving results which is based on the result rather than the method, c) financial success from said strategic efforts that ensures malliable school kids with a lack of individuality and passion will "support" their "team"!
For the objective layman, it may not strike you too obviously, but teams like Arsenal and Manchester United represent what any artist does-creating a thing of beauty and enjoying executing it. Chelsea represents a system, with parameters and boundaries fuelled by logic, with method and not passion, Chelsea represents seeking results-money, as opposed to seeking satisfaction.
This year if Manchester United avoid a Devon Loch, they can go on to win the EPL and maybe the FA cup. That would mean beauty CAN win, and it would remove from Chelsea's ranks the one argument they'll always be able to use-that they win. It would mean we can still HOPE!
Hopefully ofcourse true beauty will win some more next year, when Arsenal seek the title after far too long. Till then, Go Man utd, may your plagued souls rotting in evil save the day, so Chelsea can suffer and hopefully vent on Assley Hole's body.

The Cashley slating and football hoo hah in general has been brought on in large part due to ARSEBLOG-the finest damn arse in the land!
Good day!